Tony and I are not engaged nor do we have any solid plans on marriage. We do however talk about getting married and what holds us back is financial reasons and family reasons.
For 1) weddings are expensive and we refuse to do a justice of the peace style wedding (not that anything is wrong with that way of being married, it's just not for us as we like to go all out on things). We aren't like most Americans who have a credit card in their wallet to help with most of the wedding cost, we prefer to do everything with cash to avoid being in debt. The only debt we have is my car and doctor bills. In December Tony gets his raise which will help us out a ton financially. Come March most of my debt (doctor bills) will be paid off and so will Tony's. Also in March Tony is done with the classes he has to take bc of me calling the cops on him, so that extra expense will be gone. Those classes aren't cheap, AT ALL. Everyday our credit is improving and that is what is most important to us at this point in our lives. Also in March we will try and get our dream house with the land we want. So financially a wedding isn't very feasible at our current status, but in March that should all change so I am planning now for a wedding around June-October 2010. LOL.. I should add that my dad has always said he would pay for our wedding but once again that's not how Tony and I do things. I will let my dad "help" pay for the wedding and figure out how much that "help" will be after I plan the entire thing and see what my total cost is.
#2)Family. Friends. For years we've delayed having a wedding because of scheduling around all our family who all live in different places. My family all live in Louisiana and my parents are always on the road traveling for the job (they would come no matter what). Tony's mom and step dad live in California ( they would come, I think). Tony's dad also travels for work with the same company as my parent and that Tony works for (he is a strong maybe to attend). Tony's brother and his wife live in Rhode Island and we don't expect them to attend our wedding anyways since we were unable to attend theirs a few months ago (maybe). Tony's sister and her husband and kids live in Vermont, we also don't expect them to attend bc we weren't able to attend theirs a few months ago either( I really think negative on this one). (we didn't go to his brother or his sisters wedding bc we couldn't afford both within two months of each other so we didn't think it was fair to choose one). So we are now over the fact that most of his family wouldn't come and we don't care who can't come bc it's not about them it's about us. For the family and friends from out of town who want to come but can't afford it, we will either be paying for the trip or helping to pay for a portion of their trip. ( so once again back to the financial). My friends from Louisiana, I know for sure Mary would come. My friends from Colorado, well they all live here and wouldn't really have to travel so I'm sure most of them would be there.
HAHA, so I am considering those things the petty parts of planning a wedding. The hard parts are the venues and such. I now know I want a barn or outdoor wedding. I have two picked out that I LOVE. Here are their links
This is kinda your all in one package which I love because we would all be so close with our out of towners. But it requires 4 nights and I know no one would really be able to stay 4 nights.
If we were to choose this as the location we would use the second floor of the barn where the big balcony doors open up to look outside (see pic 8 on the site). It is the most expensive spot on the ranch but my fave.
Let me know what you think about the two places I like. I'm sure I will find more places to add to this list but for now these two are doing it for me.